Does what it says on the tin

Katie Anderson is unable to see the point of this weak comedy adaptation

The Men Who Stare at Goats - 1hr 33mins, 15

2/5

Was there some joke I missed?Was this one of those dreams where you suddenly find yourself on your school stage, completely naked and with a hall-full of spotty kids guffawing loudly at your feet?

These are the thoughts that Men Who Stare At Goats tipped me towards.I'm sure it was supposed to be funny but apart from a battered base of Jedi jokes, genuine humour seemed to be lying low.

Perhaps I'm not being entirely fair. There were comic touches, like George Clooney's ill-inspired flying lunge at his Iraqi captors or Jeff Bridge's half-hearted defence of the drug and prostitution charges made against him and his men,"well, the hooker thing is definitely a lie".However these were not nearly frequent enough to justify the time invested.

As for plot, Bob Wilton's (Ewan McGregor) search for a story bigger than his small-time reporting job provides the catalyst for the unfolding action. He follows the trail of a concealed revolutionary sector from the US Army twenty years ago to Iraq where he runs into Lyn Cassidy (George Clooney).Lyn happens to be a former member of the controversial unit, "First Earth", which was supposed to have taught its soldiers to down their guns and harness psychological powers to instil peace in their opponents instead.

Bob joins Lyn on a mission to answer the call of First Earth's charismatic leader, Bill Django (Jeff Bridges), but soon ends up regretting his decision in the ensuing onslaught of Iraqi unfriendliness, and physical deterioration.

The film never really felt like it was going anywhere, with no clear sense of progression; it meandered through flashbacks and ever more ridiculous scenarios. But a ride bound for nowhere wouldn't have been a problem if the journey had just been more entertaining.

It wasn't believable enough to emotionally involve, or funny enough to merit the intemperate tone of ridiculousness. Time and time again every filmgoer's latent Star Wars affection was exploited through cliched "the force is strong in this one" moments as the fighting unit earn their Jedi warrior status.

However, Jeff Bridges' performance as the hippy Bill Django is as perfect as the immaculate hair braid of his self-discovery. The rest of the Hollywood elite also do their job to ensure the film never veers into complete car crash territory (with the exception of Ewan McGregor's grating American accent).

The concept itself of a peace-loving, flower-wielding Army division that can psychologically contort the enemy is strangely appealing yet this nice idea fails to translate., making it blindingly obvious that however many big names you stack up, if there's an elephant in the room (or in this case, the script) it won't be hidden.

A misguided, if interesting dimension was the attempt at political satire. At one point, Bob and Lyn become embroiled in the cross-fire of two opposing security firms in Iraq with each claiming the other fired first.

This obvious nod to the booming personal security sector in post-war Iraq falls unfortunately flat due to a less than incisive wit from our resident narrator, Bob. Ewan McGregor's performance is definitely the weakest, though he did have the burden of his character being an irritating and needy idiot. I managed to foster no empathy for Bob during his treacherous foray into the Middle East and wasn't too concerned if he was held for kidnapper's ransom or simply dehydrated under a sand dune. 

I wanted to like it, I really did.I even forced out the odd chuckle just for Kevin Spacey's sake, but despite good acting and a half-decent idea it just didn't have enough comic leverage to secure an enjoyable enough cinematic encounter.

The Men Who Stare at Goats is now showing at Vue Cinemas.

Katie Anderson