Cambridge University unready for zombie invasion

28 June 2011

The University is not prepared to cope with a zombie apocalypse, The Cambridge Student has learned.

The news follows a similar revelation in Leicester, where a Freedom of Information request revealed that the City Council has no provisions to protect itself from a zombie plague.

A concerned citizen asked: “Can you please let us know what provisions you have in place in the event of a zombie invasion? Having watched several films it is clear that preparation for such an event is poor and one that councils throughout the kingdom must prepare for.”

Lynn Wyeth, head of information governance for the Council, told the BBC that “she was unaware of any specific reference to a zombie attack in the council’s emergency plan.” Leicester is only 59 miles from Cambridge as the crow flies, and given the rate at which infection typically spreads, shambling hordes of un-dead could be massing outside Trinity College days after an outbreak in the city.

Students greeted the news with dismay. “I literally can’t believe Cambridge hasn’t prepared for this,” a Pembroke second year said. “If we get eaten alive, where will the future leaders of the country come from?”

A University spokesperson said: “there are currently no health and safety plans to deal with zombies. Perhaps this is something we should be looking into.”

Cambridge University Students’ Union, Student Support Officer Morgan Wild said: “Given that the brains of Cambridge students could be a particularly nutritious snack for your more discerning zombie, it is shocking that the University has not developed a plan to protect students’ welfare, should the unthinkable occur.”

James Burton – News Editor

Image: The Walking Dead comic book artist Charlie Adlard dressed as a zombie on set of The Walking Dead Atlanta, Georgia. Copyright TWD productions LLC Courtesy of AMC.