Freshers’ Bucket List: Part III

Freya Sanders 5 November 2014

After the success of the TCS Bucket List published last Easter Term, the team at The Cambridge Student has produced a bigger, better and more beautiful edition, especially for Freshers of 2014. Go forth, new Cantabs, and enjoy this city.

41. Play scrabble in a lecture
It's healthy to take a break now and then, and Scrabble is super intellectual. It's also fairly sedate: so if you make a habit of it, progress to bananagrams, which is much more difficult to play subtly.

42. Get into the DM on Caesarean Sunday
The Daily Mail's coverage of student 'debauchery' on Caesarean Sunday – which signals the end of fun and the start of hard work in exam term – is infamous. Mostly for being essentially the same each year, and for dramatically demonising all students for venture out their front doors on the dangerous day. To read our assessment of this year's offering, click here. You can also view the pictures that the DM published, and start planning your outfit: it seems people wearing bikinis and binbags are most likely to make the cut.

Observe the responsibly-sourced bags: horrifying.

43. Go on a swap
Because it's Cambridge, and we're all a bit socially awkward, we seem to need at least half a bottle of wine in us before we contemplate conversing with new people. Thus the swap was invented, to allow groups of guys and girls from different colleges to bind over substandard curry and odd outfits; to read more about the latter, click here. #Number43 can easily be combined with the next three challenges on the list… 

44. Go to Funky Funhouse
Whether you're a fresher freaking out at the fact that you're now a bona fide grown up, or a finalist running away from adulthood, Funky Funhouse is a massively fun place to pass an evening. By day, a children's indoor activity centre; by night, a temple of infantile fun for students seeking sweet escapism, the idea behind Funky Funhouse is undoubtedly a bit weird. But lucky for us, Cambridge embraces the bizarre. Byob.

45. Stay in Life until the bitter end
Probably the most awful destination of Cambridge's paltry nightlife, even members of Sunday Life's cult following find it difficult to stay in the squalid cellar until 3am. By 2am, unsticking one's shoes from the floor to dance is a considerable effort; the air tastes of BO and WKD. The last hour is undoubtedly a struggle, but if you mentally prepare, avoid peaking too soon, and frequently surface for fresh air, it's manageable. If Geordie Shore can manage it, you can.

46. Have cheesey chips at Gardie's
The Gardenia on Rose Cresent is indubitably the height of Cambridge cuisine. Offering everything from halloumi pittas to chicken kebabs – and dizzying heights of fame, if you get your picture taken to be stuck up on the wall – to the revellers of Cambridge, Gardie's shuts around 4am but opens up again around 10am if late night cheesey goodness isn't your thing.

Life to Gardie's: a well-trodden path.

47. Climb to the top of Great St. Mary's 
This church is still technically defined as the centre of Cambridge – all undergraduates are supposed to live within 3 miles of the spire. It can be climbed between 10am and 4pm, except on Sundays. It'll cost you £3, but the views are worth it. 

48. Read the Chancellor of the university's Wikipedia page
A lot of people go at least a couple of terms without knowing anything about the leadership of our fine institution. Find out more about the top chap here – it explains a lot about the Cambridge students' supermarket preferences – and watch the Vice-Chancellor casually replying to Stephen Hawking's Ice Bucket Nomination here

49. Go on a RAG blind date
These take place around Valentine's Day each year, and are usually advertised spectacularly, such that they're super popular – be you single or attached, desperate or aloof. For optimum amusement, get your friends to fill out your 'About Me' form, and let them bribe so you end up on a date with someone you got with and/or puked on in Cindie's. Them sit back and enjoy two and a half years of trying not to bump into your date at Sidge.

Herbert is ready for his blind date: are you?

50. Get chucked out of Spoons
Brawl with a boatie over brunch at The Tivoli; sing Gloria Gaynor too loudly while prinking like a pauper at The Regal; play a raucous and ironic game of spoons: getting chucked out of one of Cambridge's two Wetherspoons isn't too difficult.

51. Get chucked out of Patisserie Valerie
Insult the decorative icing; haggle over your cupcake; knit violently.

52. Celebrate Holi
Holi is a big, messy party celebrated towards the end of Lent Term on Queens' Green; make sure you get yourself down to Primark no buy a cheap white tshirt before then. Once you and your compatriots look like you've just climbed out of a pit of rainbow sherbet, make sure you take loads of photos, so you can then be super original and make one your profile picture.

Holi profile pictures are original for 30 seconds maximum

53. Get locked overnight in a college that isn't your own…
…or your significant other's. Extra points if you cause a stir in the student newspapers like the recent one involving a man in Murray Edwards. If you are escorted out by the porters in the morning, you have succeeded.

54. Play Ultimate Frisbee on Jesus Green
If you're too embarrassed to join the university ultimate frisbee club (you shouldn't be, they're exceedingly welcoming), just drag a group down when you're bored of revision in Easter Term. It's an easy enough game to pick up: there aren't many rules, and the ones there are don't matter much. If it's sufficiently sunny, cool off afterwards with a dip in the Jesus Green pool.

55. Have curry on Mill Road
The closest Cambridge gets to edgy is Mill Road, just beyond Kelsey Kerridge. A hodgepodge of good charity shops, cheap Asian supermarkets, and independent cafés, it's definitely worth a lazy afternoon of exploration.

It seems distant, but it's closer to town than Girton. Significantly closer.

56. Go ice skating on Parker's Piece
After a tragic hiatus last year, the traditional ice rink is returning to Parker's Piece on 21st November. If you book early you can bag a 10% discount; if you arrive early, have one of the insanely good hot chocolates the café next door offers.

57. Buy your bedder a present
Let's face it, they have to put up with a lot.

58. Get – unintentionally – onto Overhead at Cambridge
Let's face it: the pretension of he place rubs of on everyone, so that we all make the odd ridiculously 'Cambridge' comment. Some people also have really witty friends who take advantage of trusting natures to leave socially unacceptable posts.

Try not to bid goodbye to all your social integrity

59. Work at a May Ball
It can actually be a really good way of experiencing the balls without the hefty price tag, and is often pretty fun. It's also quite a humbling experience and will make you appreciate any ticket you paid for all the more.

60. Put chocolates in all yor college pigeon holes
Give your college compatriots some lovin'; there's no better feeling than coming back from a tragic supervision to find a creme egg lurking underneath the Domino's flyers that live in your pidge.


A full list of the essential Cambridge experiences will be printed in the paper shortly. Pin it to your wall and keep track of the mad times you have here.

If you do anything utterly outrageous in your quest for Bucket List completion – or have an awesome idea for experiences to add to the list – drop us a line #TCSBucketList.

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Photos: Geoff Robinson; Google; David Nichols; Diganta Talukdar