Review: Five Lesbians Eating a Quiche

Tom Bevan 25 November 2015

As five pheromone-ravaged, sausage-renouncing ‘widows’ partook in an apocalyptic quiche-eating day, the audience found itself repeatedly melting into uncontrollable hysterics. Playful, farcical and at times drop-dead hilarious, Five Lesbians Eating a Quiche was masterfully directed by Elinor Lipman and Rhiannon Shaw.

I felt apprehensive when I entered the Corpus Playroom to be presented with a sticky-label bearing my new name for the evening – 'Jennifer' – and took my rank amongst 80 proud lesbians – some of whom looked suspiciously male. However, in performance, the playful interaction with the audience was so tastefully applied that it sharpened the comedy without making anybody feel alienated – well, except perhaps meat-loving, quiche-saboteur 'Margery'.

Emma Kemsley-Pein, playing 'Ginny' – a disfavoured, lesbian-in-denial from Kensington – was fully committed to the performance. Being seated only a metre or so from her, when she pounced upon and desolated that quiche, I was well and truly in the splash zone. Hilarious, yet absolutely disgusting, I would recommend bringing an umbrella to the performance if you plan on sitting in the front row, in order to shield yourself from projectile fragments of egg-based flan.

Emma Blacklay-Piech played 'Dale', a tragic, ditsy Texan, who made the audience cry with laughter an instant before breaking our hearts. Maintaining a hilarious deep South drawl for over an hour, a truly skilled actress. Each word that fell from Evie Butcher’s mouth, as Lulie, was met with terrified laughter; who knew it was possible to be quite that passionate about the E-G-G?

Amy Malone and Molly Stacey, 'Vern' and 'Wren' respectively, also put in tremendous performances. The proudest of the lesbians and doubly enthusiastic about quiches, when there was a minor technical-difficulty with the door, it was dealt with so well by these actors that it merely added to the comedy.

At times one's ears begged for a break from the shrillness of so much high-pitched shouting at once. However, even if one could not ignore the ringing in one’s ears, it detracted little from an uproarious show. This farce had the audience cracking up at least half a dozen times a minute; iffy Week 7 puns aside, I highly recommend this explosive, flantastic comedy.